How Does Dating/Marriage and Our Faith Connect?

John 3:3

“I tell you the truth, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again.”

Yesterday was amazing.  Easter is always a high for me – but yesterday was something special – better than the normal Easter – whatever that measures to be.  I hope you felt that way too.

We mentioned that Easter is different if you walk to the cross first – if you take a deep look at the Cross of Calvary and the love of Christ in sacrificing His life for us.  I hope you were able to do that this year – and if you did – maybe that is why Easter was special this year.  A member of our congregation mentioned that Easter will never be the same for them – because they attended our Good Friday service and experienced the cross.

Today I wanted to add to that – that unless we are born again – a follower of Christ – a Christian – Easter is merely a nice holiday with bunnies – eggs – spiral ham – maybe attendance in church and possibly some family gatherings.  Jesus makes it very clear – in several places in the Bible – that being His follower is required for eternity in heaven – eternity in His presence.

With that as the backdrop – I want to talk about the family – and specifically – today – couples.  Yesterday in the message we mentioned that hurting people hurt because of their choices – the choices of others – and Satan’s attacks.  I want to talk about a very important choice we might all face or have faced – that of choosing a life partner.  With our daughter’s wedding coming soon – this is on my heart.

Some people have litmus tests for whom they will date/marry.  Have you ever developed one yourself?  Here are some examples: tall – dark and handsome.  Good job – funny – good personality – intelligent – good conversationalist.  Looks – looks – looks!  Athletic – fun to be with – a good family man/woman.  The lists could continue.  Do you have a list?  Did you have a list? What would be on your list?

When our daughters were growing up – we prayed for three things for their future partners in life. In reverse order they were: 3) that they would work hard together to provide for themselves (good work ethic), 2) that this person would love my daughter almost as much as we do, (love them) and 1) that this person loved Jesus as their personal Lord and Savior (a Christian – not just a church attendee).

The Bible talks about being unequally yoked.  2 Corinthians 6:14 – Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? Jesus says; “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” John 14:6

My mother use to say to me don’t date anyone you wouldn’t marry – which means – don’t date anyone with character traits or other issues that you couldn’t accept in marriage.  If he smokes – and you can’t accept that – don’t even date unless he proves he has stopped.  If she gossips – and you can’t stand that – don’t even date until she proves she has stopped.  Thinking you will change her/him after you start dating or are married is a failed philosophy way too often.  Too many times people go into relationships with the thought that they will change their partner – and more often than not – that fails!

So if you wouldn’t want to marry a non-Christian – don’t date one.  If you believe that the only way into the eternal presence of God is through Jesus Christ – don’t date someone who doesn’t believe the same way.  It is too essential for you and for your future family.  It is too hard to raise children alone – either physically or in the faith.  I have seen way too many couples who were unequally yoked and the harm it causes – temporally and I imagine – eternally – is beyond measure at times.

We have choices in life – and at times our choices cause us pain.  Here is one choice you can make that has a better chance of being a good one if you seek to partner with someone who has a deep love for Jesus Christ (not just a church attendee).

Just something to think about today as you go on your way.

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