Ray McDonald's Blog

Thoughts and Reflections

Biblical Marriage

Ephesians 5:22

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.


I’m sure some will react to the passage of the day – right away!  Marriage is a God given institution between a man and a woman (God’s design was for marriage to be between a man and a woman – humans in their sin have changed the social norm but not the God ordained design). Marriage takes work and effort. It is not simply find a mate and marry. Serving the Lord needs to be at the center of your marriage if it is to be pleasing to God. We’ve seen some Biblical instructions about marriage and the marriage relationship in the Scriptures. Today I want to write about the subject of submission.

Submission is not a subject that many like to highlight.  Women especially don’t like it – yet it is still part of Scripture.  We’ve all read the Ephesians passage – our passage today.  Ephesians 5:22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.  Men have this one memorized and fail to read the verse before and those that come after it.  Ephesians 5:21Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Here is a another passage – just a few verses behind today’s passage – that husbands need to read.  Ephesians 5:25-28 – 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

Submission is a willingly offered gift.  With nearly 40 years of pastoral counseling and over 34 years of marriage I can say with confidence that a woman who feels loved, protected, cherished and honored will not have an issue with this Biblical submission. A wife who realizes that their husband has the best interest of the family or their partnership at heart will have little problem yielding in the few circumstances of life where mutual agreement cannot be reached.  Most decisions in a marriage can be mutually agreed upon for sure.

In my married life of 34 plus years I can only count a handful (that would be five or less) of times when I made a decision that was not a mutual decision. It doesn’t happen daily folks.  Often we have disagreed – but because a decision wasn’t timely or vital – we have waited to do many things until we agreed.  In those few times when a decision had to be made and we were not in agreement – I made what I thought was the best decision for our family – at times it wasn’t my choice.  At times the decision that is made is to yield the decision to my wife.  Being the husband means I have certain responsibilities – it doesn’t mean I will always be right – but if I pray on it and lean on my wife – I can usually come to the right decision (when I must).  I’d love some debate on this subject.  Leave your thoughts.

Just something to think about today as you go on your way.

January 2, 2015 - Posted by | Church, Community, Daily Devotion, Daily Prayer, Discipleship, Encouragement, Faith Journey, Family, From the Pastor, Leadership, Marriage, Personal, Prayer, Theology | , , , , , ,


  1. I appreciate your blog posts and thoughts Pastor Ray. I haven’t commented for awhile but still read your posts everyday. Looking forward to the 21 days of prayer and fasting. Keep up the good work sir.


    Comment by Mary | January 3, 2015 | Reply

    • Thanks Mary, I have missed you. Be blessed!


      Comment by raymcdonald | January 3, 2015 | Reply

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